Have you ever experienced or currently experiencing situation where your 4 years old child attack you with non-stop questions? If yes, then you can understand how I feel in overcoming it. Or even vice versa, I do understand how you feel as a wiki-parent who force to have all answers to the child questions.
Questions like why this, why that, who is that, what they are talking about, where this come from and other bank of questions which exhaust you to answer the questions so he/she could be satisfied with the answers and wish he/she will not ask another following questions. In my context, it’s like an airplane-wings, on one side I am proud with my son’s high level of curiosity and being critical, and on the other side I am triggered to think for the right answers. But if I give up, I throw the questions to my wife and let her deal with him. 🙂
Learning about Coaching from LOOP, that according to International Coach Federation (ICF) coaching is partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential. Understanding deeper about the definition, I realize that all this time I have been coached and am coached by my son with his questions. Though the questions seem simple, but I was triggered to really think the appropriate answers, and creatively look for explanation that easily understandable.
When I am with him in this question and answer moment, I am positioning myself not as his parent but as if I am his peer. Sometimes, I adjust my intonation and style of speech the way he does :). I may say that I am applying the partnering principle that base the relationship with respect to every question he asks and no judgement. And is my personal potential optimized? Yes, for sure. I am now enjoying more and waiting for the Q&A moments with him which previously, I was counting on my wife to help me answer the questions oftenly.
Insight-fully, learning to be a coach is not that hard. We can learn from the closest people we have and with the knowledge gained from LOOP, I can say that My Son is My Coach and he has successfully made his father understand the meaning of coaching and learn to keep practicing the skill of listening and asking question, which are part of the key competency of coaching.
I love you, son!
Author: Ari Yuda Laksmana